Forgotten Memories

There is a time loneliness sets in, not from the people around me but from the ones inside me. Those are the moments I seek the pleasure of writing, and some of the pieces find their way into this collection.

Management by me...

Anyone who has been a commerce student knows how much useless stress is put on "management". Hell, even the engineers and doctors know that. 
After spending last two years of my life mugging up different aspects, features, characteristics, importance, techniques blah blah blah, I am kind of sick of the whole idea. And I am just in my first year. God save me.
All the management self help books ever written and sold are mostly crap, and should be titled "How to rob your organisation off its money", "How to save your organisation from being robbed", "How to hoodwink your employees into working overtime and not realizing it", "How to manipulate idiots", "How to look like an idiot yourself by giving out useless motivation speeches" and "How to make sure your juniors don't report your dirty tricks to the dirtier people".
I think when management was integrated into the educational curriculum, nobody knew that it would become such a bundle of nonsense. Anyone who seriously knows how to do things can use a lot of bullshit to fool the people around him/her.
Plus the whole claims of "having mutual profits" and "Win win situations" are completely baseless. Recently, we were doing communication strategies in class which were broadly divided into Win- Win and Win- Lose. Our lecturer explained the basis of both and then went on to teach us the principles of Win- Win strategy only. I was more interested in Win- Lose. Turns out its an unfavorable situation and has been scrapped off the course. Meh.
I actually prefer the theoretical aspects of the subject sometimes as it lays down an organised way of thinking, something that can used if somebody wants to. Calculation part is fine as it carries a kind of base. This is why I opted for finance- more sensible than HR(where you have to do a lot of buttering) and marketing(which will land you in hell). Finance can also land you in hell, but for a shorter period of time.  But things turn ugly when you have to cram "steps".
For example, first step in planning is "Vision" followed by "Goal" followed by "Target" followed by more. WTF.
One more thing in the whole subject is how organizations value their employees, they should be provided with facilities yada yada yada. Big big Beeeg nonsense again. Employees are first to be kicked out at any point of time. Senior employees should be bribed suitably so that they don't leak out your company's secrets. But whose company is it anyway? The BOD barely owns share in single digit figures. They basically don't give a fucking damn as long as IT department doesn't raid their houses.
So all the B- schools- you would do some real good if you teach your students how to invest in stocks so that they can start earning before they complete their first year. You can also teach them how to lie more convincingly, gift them nice formals for interviews and ask them to develop competitive spirit by playing video games. They will send you more crappy self help management books which you can stock in your library to show off. 



2 comments:

Nice, but then, if the b schools do that, how will you knw wat bullcrap is in those books anyways...
see it as a different method of teaching...like they teach you nonsense, soo that the best brains can figure out for themselves that wat is being taught is bullcrap n is not to be used...
see that is management at the first level...
;-)

 

@ Eon
Point. But you do know how much I study during my lectures ;) Bless Gtalk!
Thanks for the comment

 

Post a Comment